Helen and Margaret’s Pledge to America
I pledge that I will actually read the Constitution before pledging to uphold it. And I pledge that if I am too stupid to understand its intent, I won’t become a politician.
I pledge not to start two wars, give tax breaks to millionaires, ruin the economy and then get mad when someone shows me the bill.
I pledge not to be a hypocrite or a Tea Party Republican – whichever comes first.
I pledge to remember that religious freedoms apply to all religions including the lack of a religion. And I pledge to remember that no matter how much I believe in my religion, I will remember that my neighbor believes in his religion just as much. And finally, I pledge that if I believe in my religion too much I will keep it to myself.
I pledge to stop calling Sarah Palin a stupid bitch when she finally admits that she is too stupid to run this country. At that point I will simply call her a bitch and let the stupid speak for itself.
I pledge that I won’t hate gay people in public and then sleep with them in private.
I pledge to accept the fact that John McCain really can’t pull his head out of his ass at this point. It’s in too deep.
I pledge not to be shocked when Rick Sanchez announces his new show on Fox News.
I pledge to remember that there are 6 billion people in the world and only 300 million of them live in the United States . And with 300 million Americans to choose from, we can’t do better than John Boehner? Really?
And Margaret, my dear, I pledge that I will vote on November 2. I meant it. Really.
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
That about sums it up, dear. That and Endust is as good if not better than Pledge.
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